Mrs. Johnson the Christian school math teacher was having children do problems on the blackboard. She was constantly trying to incorporate Christian themes in the classroom, but was having trouble making it work for math until she got some unexpected help from a student.
“Who would like to do the first problem, addition?”
No one raised their hand. She called on Tommy, and with some help he finally got it right.
“Who would like to do the second problem, subtraction?”
Students hid their faces. She called on Mark, who got the problem but there was some suspicion his girlfriend Lisa whispered it to him.
“Who would like to do the third problem, division?”
Now a low collective groan could be heard as everyone looked at nothing in particular. The teacher called on Suzy, who got it right
“Who would like to do the last problem, multiplication?”
Johnny’s hand enthusiastically shot up. It surprised everyone in the room because he had previously been avoiding participation. The teachers finally gained her composure in the stunned silence.
“Why the enthusiasm, Johnny?” He said, “The Bible says to go forth and multiply!”
All posts by salt@mathesonuk.com
I Can Be Like You Whenever I Want
I did some schools work in Kent recently and met a young christian girl who had decided that “virgin” wasn’t a dirty word and that she was going to stay that way until her wedding day. However, the pressure was on. She was often made the butt end of jokes and had to listen to her classmates’ stories of their sexual conquests. In the end she got a “holy strop” on and said to them, “You don’t understand do you? I can be like you whenever I want, but you can never be like me!” It’s more of that crusading spirit we need to stand strong!
Soul Survivor Magazine Aug 1997 – Duncan Banks, p3
One Partner For Life
Delegates and experts at the last World AIDS Conference in the USA were asked two simple questions. Firstly, would you use a condom to guarantee protection from both pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases? The unanimous answer was NO.
The second was to ask what they would do. The reply was fascinating. They suggested sticking with one partner for life. Wow! This came as a shocking revelation to the world press even though God’s word has always seggested this as the best way to live (Matt 19:4-6)
Soul Survivor Magazine Aug 1997, p3 – Duncan Banks
David Bowie
In a recent Daily Mail interview the aging legend David Bowie conceded; “If there is one thing I could say to 13 and 14 year old’s it’s this; ‘Take care with your sexual choices because never before have sex and death been so powerfully linked.’”.
Soul Survivor Magazine Aug 1997 p3 – Duncan Banks
Letter From Summer Scoutcamp
Dear Mom,
Scoutmaster Webb told us to write our parents in case you heard about the flood and got worried. We’re all OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Nobody drowned because we were all on the mountain looking for Chad when it happened. Oh yeah, please call Chad’s mother and tell her he’s OK. He can’t write her because of the cast on his arm.
I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps! It was neat! We never would have found him in the dark if it hadn’t been for all the lightning.
Scoutmaster Webb got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire, so he probably didn’t hear him.
Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blow up? It was so cool! The wet wood still wouldn’t burn, but one of our tents did, and some of our clothes. Boy, Johnny is going to look weird until his hair grows back!
We’ll be home Saturday if Scoutmaster Webb gets the car fixed. It wasn’t his fault about the wreck. The brakes worked when we left, but he said with a car that old you have to expect something to break down. That’s probably why he can’t get insurance. We think it’s a neat car. He doesn’t care if we get it dirty, and if it’s hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the tailgate. It gets pretty hot with 15 people in the car. He let us take turns riding in the trailer until the policeman stopped and yelled at him.
This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming out in the lake. Scoutmaster Webb wouldn’t let me because I can’t swim, and Chad was afraid he would sink because of his cast, so he let us take the canoe across the lake. It was great. You still can see some of the trees under the water from the flood. Scoutmaster Webb isn’t crabby like some Scoutmasters. He didn’t even get mad about us leaving the life jackets behind. He has to spend a lot of time working on the car, so we’re trying not to cause him any trouble.
Guess what? We passed our First Aid merit badges. When Dave dove in the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works. Also, Wade and I threw up. Scoutmaster Webb said it probably was just food poisoning from the leftover chicken. He said they got sick like that with the food they ate in prison. I’m so glad he got out and became our Scoutmaster. He said he figured out how to do things better while he was doing time.
I have to go now. We are going into town to mail this and buy some bullets and more gasoline. Don’t worry about anything. We are doing just fine.
Love,
Your son
Salt: A Big History
Salt is incredibly valuable. In an agricultural it was essential to preserve fish, meat, vegetables and even mummies!
Roman soldiers were paid in salt, salt had the same value ounce for ounce as gold.
A Saint Is …
“The story is told of a minister who in talking with the children of a congregation asks them what a “saint” is. One of the children looks at the stained glass windows of the church and says, “A saint is a person the sun shines through.”
Sacrifice In The Bible
“Sacrifice in the Bible means that we give to God the best we have; it is the finest form of worship. Sacrifice is not giving up things, but giving to God with joy the best we have.”
Oswald Chambers
Worship And Sacrifice
“Sacrifice is the essential act of external worship. It is a prayer which is acted, a symbolic action which expresses both the interior feelings of the person offering it, and God’s response to this prayer. It is rather like tha symbolic actions of the prophets. By sacrificial rites, the gift made the God is accepted, union with God is achieved and th eguilt of the man is taken away. But these effects are not achieved by magic, it is essential that the external action should express the trus inner feelings of man, and that it should be favourably received by God.”
Roland De Vaux – Ancient Israel, P451
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to?
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night. You pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the bus:
- An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
- An old friend who once saved your life.
- The perfect man (or) woman you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car? Think before you continue reading. This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a
job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first, or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer.
WHAT DID HE SAY?
He answered: I would give the car keys to my old friend, and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the woman of my dreams.
Quoted from http://www.cybersalt.org email list